Another Office:mac 2008 Bug

September 22nd, 2008

 

Check this one out. I’ve been using change tracking to make sure I know who’s doing what to which file.

I had some text in a small box at the top of the page and wanted to colour that box’s text in red to make it stand out.

A simple enough request, you’d think.

Unfortunately, change it to red and the Whole Flipping Document (TM) turns red!

I’ve found several bugs while in change tracking mode. It’s far easier to return to regular editing mode, make the changes and then come back. You’ll not have those changes recorded, but at least the changes will be applied properly.

Office 2008 really isn’t ready for prime time.

Office 2008 for the Mac (Office:mac) is bugged beyond belief!

September 20th, 2008

 

What is it about Microsoft that makes them incapable of releasing software packed to the rafters with show stopping bugs?

What I mean to say is that Office 2008 is as buggy as Hell! Come on Microsoft, this is your flagship suite on the Mac, often the only exposure to your company diehard Mac users ever get. And what do you give them? Shit on a plate.

We’ve got this project on at the moment, and I’ve been trying to get it done, but Office:mac 2008 just doesn’t seem to want to let me.

Let’s start with the good stuff:

  • Excel 2008 on my Intel Mac Mini scrolls noticably faster than Office 2004 on the same machine. So although my 2.4GHz iMac 24″ is fast enough to handle the Rosetta translation from PPC to Intel without noticable performance issues, my Mac Mini clearly struggles with 2004. Exel 2008 is, once up and running, smoother on this limited machine.
  • Entourage 2008 is better than 2004. It’s faster, cleaner and stalls less often when syncing my Hotmail. Enough said. Way to go Microsoft.

OK, that’s the good stuff out of the way, now the bad stuff:

  • No Visual Basic. WTF?

Excuse me? But HTF am I supposed to run my spreadsheets without Visual Basic? Don’t give me some cock and bull story about “Applescript is the standard script on the Mac, so we changed to Applescript.”

Since when have you ever cared about standards, Microsoft?

Put VB back in and we’ll talk some more.

  • Less stable than Naomi Campbell

Excel crashed twice last night, in three hours. That’s just a joke. It would stall for a second and vanish without a trace. And not just last night, but often.

  • It’s fat, flabby and slow

Why is it that my copy of Office 2004 running in emulation on an Intel Mac is faster than Office 2008 running native (bar the aforementioned scrolling) on the same machine?

Excel 2004 takes less than 10 seconds to boot, Excel 2008 takes almost twice as long! Come on! This is not acceptable. This is native code and it’s being trounced by emulated code!

Now, it may run faster, but what am I doing that needs the speed? It’s not like I’m running any cunning VB scripts… ’cause they removed it! And who in their right mind is going to develop ultracomplex Applescript macros when Microsoft themselves said they’re going to put VB back in in the next release…

Sounds like they used the same programmers that made Vista.

  • Bugs

There are just too many. Really. I’m not going to bore you with any but these two which have cost me considerable productivity time.

I saved a file as an XLSX (Excel XML format) and was completely unable to open it in office 2004 and Office 2003 on the PC, even with the Version 11.5 update and the Compatibility pack installed! I had to connect to my iMac at home, resave the file as an Excel 97~2003 file and try again. Strange though, only a couple of files have showed this bug… But then, that’s the nature of bugs, isn’t it.

Display issues are currently a real annoyance.

Check out these screenshots:

View a sheet at 100% and all is well. 

Zoom in to 125% and everything turns into hashes.


It doesn’t matter if you expand a column out, the hashes just multiply to fill the gap!


It’s only when you SHRINK the column that the hashes disappear and text appears.

Twiddle the width of the column a little and the text comes back.

Come ON Microsoft, this is NOT production quality software.

Solution

  • There is no solution at present.

I recommend sticking with 2004, which while being a foible laden application suite is stable, predictable and reliable; three concepts I’ve started to take more seriously the older I’ve got.

I’m going to wait for a couple of service packs and try it again later. In the meantime and for the first time ever, I’ve reinstalled an earlier version of Office!

Fix the extra ARD toolbar functions for Screen Sharing after OS X 10.5.5 update

September 18th, 2008

I’d like to thank a couple of my readers for telling me how to remedy the problem of the ARD Screen Sharing toolbar function hack that can no longer be applied once one upgrades to OS X 10.5.5.

The solution is glaringly obvious and I’m a bit annoyed I didn’t spot it myself.

Just use Time Machine and search for the Screen Sharing application, located in /System/Library/CoreServices/Screen Sharing.app and return to an older version of the app!

You gotta love Apple for handing you the solution on a plate.

Alternatively, dig out your Leopard DVD and pull it off there.

You’ll apparently get bugged by an upgrade screen.

I had read that Apple were trying to cut down on “Frankenbuilds” using software from different versions of the OS, but I guess this is still OK.

I’d like to try this, but since I have a nice, fully functional ARD 3.2 installed there’s not much point for me!

Still, I may try it one day. Let me know how you get on with these tips.

After Mac OS X 10.5.5 - cannot reenable additional Screen Sharing (ARD) functions hack

September 17th, 2008

I’d reported that a hack existed to enable Apple Remote Desktop (ARD) alike functionality in the humble built in Screen Sharing client in this post.  Unfortuantely, this hack no longer works to enable the ARD like client functions in Leopard 10.5.5, which means:

  • No more black and white or 256 colour (greyscale) quality for low bandwidth connections.
  • No more clipboard copying.
  • No more curtains for the remote screen.
  • And: NO MORE FULL SCREEN VNC!

Oh! Unless, that is, you splash out $299 for a TEN LICENCE ADMINISTRATOR’S PACK!

Jeezus H Kriste and his twelve frollicking followers! Leopard must now have the world’s only VNC client that costs $299 to enable full screen.

Kind of reminds me of when Apple used to charge $29 to enable the amzingly awesome

  • Quicktime “Pro” function:  playback video full screen…

Except that this costs more than 10 times the price!

As much as I still like Mac OS X, things like this are REALLY starting to get my goat.

Sorry, but I’m going to use large numbers of capital letters for a purpose other than acronyms. If you find them offensive, please stop reading, you have been warned.

APPLE: FULL SCREEN VNC IS *NOT* A PRO FEATURE FOR FROLICK’S SAKE!

It’s a feature required and wanted by practically anyone who uses an EFFING laptop to access their glorious BUT REMOTE computer at home with its Full High Definition screen. Or those need to access one Mac from another AT FULL SCREEN QUALITY WITHOUT GOLLYGOSHDARNITSTINKINGMUTHARUBBING SCALING!!!

IS IT SO FRICKIN’ MUCH TO ASK FOR BOUNCING BARNACLE’S SAKE?

Why is it on the PC I can have any resolution I choose, but with the Mac I’m stuck with a crappy frame grab of the whole fragging screen at full spiggotting resolution! For fume’s sake… (Can you tell I’m trying my best not to swear!)

Oh Fuck it! I’m installing ARD… available for download from your nearest and dearest search engine.

Apple Post Mac OS X 10.5.5 Update - Nothing to Report

September 17th, 2008

We have a nice selection of Macs all now updated to 10.5.5 without fanfare.
Each machine is quite different and has a very different selection of software installed and hardware connected.

  • Mac Mini (Intel 1.83GHz Core 2 Duo) - Mac OS 10.5 Server
    • Server version of Mac OS X
    • External Firewire storage
    • USB Memory Card Reader
    • iMac 24″ (Intel 2.4GHz Core 2 Duo)
  • Vista under Boot Camp
    • Various large video and graphical editing packages.
    • MS Office
    • Firewire 800 RAID storage
    • USB Card Reader
    • Firewire Scanner
    • Graphical Pen Tablet
  • 12″ Powerbook (PPC 1.5GHz)
    • MS Office
  • Power Mac G4 Cube (PPC 1.4GHz)
    • MS Office
    • Zend Studio for Eclipse
    • Entropy PHP on Apache Package
    • Scanner
    • Printer
    • Graphical Tablet
  • iMac 15″ (PPC 700MHz, dome shaped effort)
    • MS Office

I have upgraded all to Mac OS X 10.5.5 from 10.5.4 without a hitch, directly from Apple Software Update.

Now, there are some seriously arcane steps recommended by MacFixIt Macintouch and a few other sites,
such as booting into Safe Mode, disconnecting everything but the mouse and keyboard, standing up and turning around thrice before touching your nose with a rose scented towel, etc.

But I’ve never, once bothered with them. If I ever encounter a problem, or I suspect that a problem has occurred I just run the complete Combo Update from Apple Downloads.

p.s. 10.5.5 Combo is about 700MB in size.

Anyway… the reboot process took longer than usual, with a what might once have been disconcerting restart half way through.

All came back to normal, fine. No apparent differences in day to day operations. Goodness knows what the “extensive graphical updates” were. Probably just bug/stability fixes.

Will see if crashes get less of a problem with this OS…

Just thought you might want to know, since everything you tend to read on line is about problems people are having. Well, luckily for me, this time (touch wood) there were no problems.

Installing Boot Camp 2.1 difficulties

September 17th, 2008

I have an iMac 24″ running Vista under the Boot Camp that came with Leopard (v 2.0)

The next software update after installing Vista advised me that Boot Camp 2.1 was available, so I downloaded it but I couldn’t install it because an error appeared:

Error applying transforms. 
Verify that the specified transform paths are valid

The problem in my case was that I was using a localised version of Vista.

The Boot Camp software is stupidly American only. It expects to find a key in the (Windows) registry with the value 1033 (American English).

Instead, it found 1041 (Japanese) and the installer stalled!

The solution is simple:

<Now for the patronising bit>

First. Back up your Windows Registry.

Read through this post entirely before starting. If any of the terms are unfamiliar, write a comment asking for assistance.

If you don’t know how to backup your Windows Registry, or don’t know what a Registry is… or heaven forbid, what a backup is, you should stop reading this post right now, do a bit of googling and come back.

<OK, end of disclaimery patronising bittage>

  • To open the Registry editor click the start button and type regedit into the search field.
  • Select Edit and Find from the regedit menu and type “Boot Camp Services” then press enter.

Note that Services may be localised to the language of your system. In my case, it was

Boot Camp サービス

since I’m using Japanese Windows. You can search just for Boot Camp” if you’re not sure, but it may throw up lots of hits.

Edit the Language D-Word entry and change it to 409 in hexadecimal (should be 1033 decimal)
Re-run the installer.
Now you should be able to successfully installthe Boot Camp update.

Faulty Apple Products on the rise!

September 8th, 2008

Apple Stuff is breaking down all around me!

Although I’m a sucker for their style, one can’t help but wonder if they’ve just lost the plot a little. Sure, I know that other stuff apparently breaks down, too. But well, let me just show you:

It seems to me that their recent drop in prices is made up for by an effectively mandatory Applecare subscription and a lot of extra worry and hassle.

Here’s my personal list of Apple Related Hassle

Mac Mini (PPC)

I recommended my good friend Brendan to move to Apple after having some bad experiences with an imported PC. After showing him my Mac Mini I used a work, he was convinced.

  • We buy the thing, take it home and it fails to boot. Straight back to Apple.

Makes me look like a right chump.

White Macbook 1st Rev (Intel)

My cousin in law sees our Mac and I suggest she buy a MacBook, since they’re easy to use and not outrageously expensive, like the MacBook Pro. She buys one.

  • Two weeks later, the pristine white case is a dirty shade of yellow around the hand rests: Straight back to Apple.
  • The battery then fails to charge and warps slightly, affecting the keyboard: Straight back to Apple.
  • A couple of months later, the thing starts beeping on start up and fails to boot. Memory failure; Straight back to Apple.
  • Now, thirteen months after purchasing it, the DVD is unrecognised: Back to Apple for a quote: $600 replacement logic board: Fuck that for a game of soldiers.

Again, I feel like an idiot recommending stuff that breaks down.

Battery of Powerbook 12″ (PPC)

Tomoko’s PowerBook 12″ Final Revision (Arguably the finest Apple Notebook ever) had a battery recall. OK, so this is a Sony issue rather than an Apple issue, but still…

  • We noticed that the battery lasted only 15 minutes to 30 minutes. Battery goes back to Apple.
  • Replacement battery is broken after less than six months of really light use! Lasts 30 minutes: Cheers for replacing the broken battery with an inferior part!

iMac 24″ (Intel)

Next, my Colleague’s new 24″ iMac had to go back

  • With a bang, smoke billows out the back one evening when he’s playing Flight Sim X on a Windows install. Overheaded, burnt component. Straight back to Apple.

Luckily for Apple, the dude (A complete Debian Linux nut) is in love with OS X and is willing to put up with loud bang and (potentially) toxic smoke cloud.

iMac 24″ (Intel)

My own iMac is so hot one cannot touch the Aluminium frame at the top left of the screen for prolonged periods.

  • Horrific heat build up, to over 80 degrees inside
  • Black circles appearing one by one on the screen in random places: Straight back to Apple.
  • Aluminium keyboard, Left Shift key no longer works reliably, meaning all capitals have to be typed with right Shift key. Currently awaiting replacement.

They did replace the thing over a weekend and a complete replacement was back within 3 days.

Apple TV (intel)

My Apple TV has NOT been a model of reliability, despite being the modern equivalent of a “wireless.”

  • Painful to pick up, it’s so hot. Can’t see it lasting long at that temperature.
  • Leave it on for a week or two and it fails to respond, requiring a reset. Warranty period over: No going straight back to Apple for this one.

Luckily I bought this thing really cheap, so I don’t care. It plays my itunes over my hifi. That’s all I needed.

Everybody else’s iPhone 3G
OK, so the volume of whinging annoys me.
  • Let’s not even start this one!
Apple used to have style, quality and reliability: They were one and the same.

Now they just have style. It quite frankly pisses me off.

hathfudn /’haTH-fudden/ (derog. vern. adj.)

September 8th, 2008

hathfudn /’haTH-fudden/ (derog. vern. adj.)


unnecessary, egregious, overloaded, wasteful, superfluous, heavy, verge of collapse, generally unstable.

Usually applied to to consumer, technical or specialist products that have an important or critical role in the user’s life or workplace.

Etymology

Having Another Two Hundred Features Users Don’t Need.

Is Apple’s philosphy of secrecy no longer tenable?

September 6th, 2008

I’ve been receiving mails and comments on my post regarding my iMac overheating and having black circles on the screen. It’s now the most popular post after my film reviews.

It would appear that the old Apple addage: “Just Works” no longer applies to much of Apple’s stuff that rolls of its Chinese production lines at the hands of pretty iphonegirls. They don’t “JUST WORK” any more: There’s too much randomness and weird shit that happens when you switch on an Apple product. Of course, it’s probably just a side effect of today’s tech’s increasing complexity, but it’s still annoying that things that used to work well don’t any more, either by accident or by design.

Here’s a list of Apple Hardware that I’ve personally seen go wrong

This is even stretching to the software:
  • I paid good wonga for a Leopard Client family pack and a Leopard  OS X Server licence only to have:
    • the VPN switch itself off randomly at incovenient moments.
    • the Web Server cache pages that have changed or even no longer even exist requiring a web server restart.
    • the Management Console throw up random “This Service has encountered an Error!” errors
    • Leopard desktops become unresponsive to mouse clicks without a Finder restart.

Then of course there are otther issues:

  • Safari for Windows leaks like a sieve, leave it on overnight to come back to 800MB of memory used up.
  • My Mobile Me account was intermittently inaccessible for several weeks.

Then there are design changes in the applications themselves that render them less useful than before:

  • iCal’s loss of the side drawer springs to mind as minor example of forcing the users to jump through more hoops than with Tiger just to edit their schedules.

Now how can Apple a reputable company allow something like this to occur? I believe the main cause is incredibly simple:

Secrecy is too high a price to pay

Apple’s secrecy is legendary. Nobody really knows anything about Apple’s future unless it has aready become the past.

This prevents wide testing of products by users before the product goes on sale (Beta testing); A process essential for modern, highly technical products. Products which have grown so large, powerful and thus complex that no longer can a single company possibly test even a significant fraction of the permutations and combinations of different factors that might cause a product to fail.

Thus. Without advanced beta testing, then, a product will lack a critical analysis stage before being hoiked on the unsuspecting customers.

I also have to say that Vista is now like the Finder in Tiger, it’s as slow as a bastard, but at least it works. Vista hasn’t crashed since SP1 was installed, despite its bad reputation. Slow, yes, unstable, no.

However, all things considered, Leopard Finder is far more usable for my Local Network heavy workload, although it’s still inferior to Windows Explorer’s Network Hierarchy of Subnets and Workgroups.

But what is important to customers?

  • Dependability, reliability, stability, functionality, performance and style. Probably in that order.

Unfortunately, Apple appears to be approaching from the rear.

There is still a chance that things will improve.

Both Apple (implicitly) and Microsoft  (indirectly) have stated that their current OSes are flawed beasts and have vowed to “go back to basics” with Snow Leopard and Windows 7 respectively.

Two OSes that promise to step back and fix everything rather than another bunch of hathfudn crap.

Who is the iPhone Girl? (Or iPhonegirl as she’s known)

September 2nd, 2008

The iPhone Girl or iPhonegirl as she’s sometimes known has generated over 20 million searches on Google’s Chinese servers alone.

Who is she and why is she so famous?

Somehow, her picture was found on an iPhone bought by a customer from Kingston upon Hull in the UK going by the Mac Rumours handle of markm49uk. He apparently debated for a few days whether or not it was ethical to post her (rather cute) face online, but in the end put up for everyone to see.

It turns out that she is one of the 270000 employees of FOXCONN the Chinese factory that assembles the majority of Apple, Dell and HP computers.

Eventually, they found out who she was and she has been given some time off to avoid the press which have been hounding her since her name was released.

The good news is:

“She is definitely not fired,” an unidentified representative from Foxconn’s factory in Shenzhen, southern China, told the newspaper Xiandai Kuaibao who called the event, “a beautiful mistake”.

Thank goodness for that.

If I knew I was going to get some more pictures of her, I’d probably buy myself an iPhone, she’s very cute… although, probably only about 15!

Oh well. I guess I’ll just have to wait until DoCoMo starts selling them.